6 Tips for Caregivers to Reset and Recharge

Glamaris Valentín Cameron migentegrande.com

Being a caregiver does not mean you’ll just help your older adults walk and cook their meals. Caring for the older adults in your family is an enormous responsibility that affects every second of your life. Many family members spend over a decade taking care of their disabled loved ones, and they lose their motivation with every passing year. More specifically, as caregivers, we end up getting sick due to work overload and constant stress. In my case, concern for my bedridden father eventually took over my life. However, when the moment came to say goodbye, I realized that “being with him” was enough. Perhaps I couldn’t address all of his pain and limitations but being with him through it all brought us both a lot of peace. So that you do not make the same mistakes I did while taking care of dad, below are 6 tips that can help you initiate a new cycle as a caregiver with hope.

• Break the ice

There are doubts and needs that you have not been able to express to your family or community out of shyness or because of that strange feeling of “I can do it by myself” that takes hold of us. The start of 2021 is the best moment to ask for help from your family and community. This can be done with small details such as buying groceries or caring for your bedridden family member for two hours. Break the silence! Express yourself with that natural drive that a “Happy New Year” brings.

• Accept the stage that both you and your older family member are going through

I would often concentrate on looking for relief or a cure for my father’s illness and I would forget that he was nearing the end of his life, a natural stage for all human beings. Accompanying our older adults during the final stages of their lives should be seen as an enriching experience. My father lived a beautiful life that was dedicated to helping every person he found along the way. The moment I accepted that it was an honor to witness the moment in which a human being finishes their journey, I understood that being a caregiver is the most important job in the world.

• Take care of your body and spirit

Completely devoting yourself to the wellbeing of a loved one cannot happen at the expense of your health. As caregivers, we have an undeniable responsibility to ourselves. It is vital that we eat correctly and exercise on a regular basis. This is incredibly difficult, but we can do it one step at a time. If you are in good health, your older adult will be better cared for.

• Speak about the process with your older adult

When we are asked how we are feeling, our answer is, “Everything’s good.” Without realizing it, this response casts aside one of the most important conversations to have at this stage. We must talk about what it means to grow old and the need to be taken care of, yet we avoid speaking about this natural stage with future generations. How many times do we complain about young people not caring for older adults? Have you noticed it’s because we never talk about the topic? The subject is so taboo that we even conceal our true age when, instead, we should be sharing with young people all the wonderful experiences that our long life has given us.

• Plan for your old age

Most caregivers in Puerto Rico are active and independent people who are older adults themselves. After observing my mother, my father’s caregiver, and other caregivers in medical appointments, hospitals, and recreational activities, I realized I wanted to be like them. But it takes preparation to reach that goal. Unfortunately, most caregivers are unable to work and their families do not pay them. This means that, in the future, many older adults will not enjoy their retirement or adequate Social Security benefits. Because of this, it is up to us caregivers to plan for our financial future. We must be entrepreneurs, as many before us have had to sell lottery tickets and cakes to have an additional income. I, not having children, must plan beyond that. I am already thinking of a long-term care center that is perfect for my needs. I am looking for it, and if I do not find it, I will help create it.

• Fall in love with telemedicine

The first time a doctor told me my appointment would be remote, I wondered if it would yield results. The appointment was for a Thursday afternoon. I was able to lock myself in my room, and while I was sitting on my bed, I shared all my doubts to my doctor as I had never done before and without having any interruptions. Appointments by telemedicine are here to stay, and the benefits include saving time and money. Ask your doctors and your older adult’s health professionals for remote medical appointments. All you have to do is pick up the phone.

The author is a journalist, television producer, and editor of the migentegrande.com webpage, which offers advice for the family members and caregivers of older adults in Puerto Rico. She also built a digital directive of health and quality of life services for our elderly. Look for more information on Facebook and Youtube as Mi Gente Grande and become part of our community of caregivers. For more information write to us at info@migentegrande.com.